'This coming new year I will be slightly less useless.'
Not really. It is said that New Year resolution(s) are bound to be broken. This is the reason, why most of the New Year resolutions are considered funny in a stupid way. If you are making one out of sheer seriousness, I bet that you will probably break it before 2015 is up.
But for the sake of tradition, this is what I resolute to do...
1. I will do less laundry and use more deodorant... screw the ozone layer!
2. On that note, I will regularly wash my boxers... use more water, yeah!
3. I will not hang around girls because all of them think I love them. Actually I do.
4. I will not eat medicine just because it looks like candy... there goes the hallucinations.
5. I will stop sending a text to someone sitting in the next room… or the same room.
6. I will take more naps instead of doing work.
7. I will stop stalking my favourite celebrity after G.E.M.'s 3-day Singapore gig.
8. I will only use profanities as adjectives in constructive sentences. Fuck yeah!
9. When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL!"
And lastly...
10. Learn what the hell "resolution" means.
Good luck with yours. I know mine will be a fail. LOL. See what I just did there? I just broke no. 9.
No comments:
Post a Comment